Notes From The Frugal Trenches - A Downshifting Journey » Frugal Living

December Goals

Frugal Trenches — Sun, 04 Dec 2011 02:39:49 +0000

I can hardly believe it is now December; over the last three months I have hardly blogged, I think because I haven’t felt like I’m capable of writing anything particularly profound, or moving, but I suddenly realized today, that maybe I should take the pressure off and instead just use this blog for what I’d like it to be in this season of our lives. And today, I’d like it to be a place I track my December goals! So here are my 10 easy goals for December.

Read my Bible every day - even if all I can manage is a passage or two! I feel as a mother, I need this quiet “spiritual milk” more than ever before!
Read out loud from a Chapter book to my children each day and take the time to talk through the plot with them to increase their reading comprehension. Because of the chronic neglect they both suffered in their previous families, my daughter’s language processing delay and my son’s speech delay, it can be a challenge for them to articulate their thoughts and it makes people think they understand less than they really do; a little daily practice will help give them the skills and confidence they need!
Get the dishes done every single night before I go to bed! There is something about dirty dishes on the counter top, or in the sink, that sets a negative tone and makes me neglect other areas in my home, too!
Write and stick to a weekly menu plan!
Spend no more than $75 a week on groceries! I really wish it didn’t have to be so high, but both my children were severely underweight at adoption and so I happily spend on foods which are helping them gain weight and grow! Their last Dr’s appt, their Dr took one look at them and said they looked like different children – their faces had filled out, their skin was better, their hair was growing etc. And the great news is, they are now in the 5th percentile on the height/weight charts! It took a LOT of work to get them there, but so worth it. Yes, we can ignore the fact that 95% of children their age are bigger than they are !
Drink 4 glasses of water per day – this hasn’t happened in three months. Bad me!
Take my children for a long trail walk each weekend.
Unplug every single Sunday. I’ve always taken a day to unplug but now that I have children, I really want it to be a day at the weekend. I feel like Sundays are so important, both in terms of a sabbath and in order to set the tone for the week and get everything ready for 5 very very full days. Sundays it is!
Finish reading Boundaries: When To Say Yes and How To Say No. Motherhood humbles you and makes you see all the areas you struggle in that you don’t want to pass onto your children. There have been eight times in the last three months, where I should have stood up and said something for the best outcome for my family, instead I was either silent or I didn’t define my/our boundaries. I’m hoping this book helps!
Go to bed every single night by 10pm & have my children in bed with lights out by 7:45 pm. I will admit right now my sleep is all over the place, probably 2 nights a week I fall asleep immediately after my children do, another two nights a week I’m up until the wee hours of the morning and the rest somewhere in between. My big goal right now is to take all the learning about my children’s needs over the last three months and establish both a rhythm for them and a rhythm for me that helps me best meet their needs. And the reality is, I need enough sleep in order to be the best parent I can be!

Those are my 10 goals for the month!

In other news, we are doing great. We have a big month this month (more on that later!) but our days are filled with sunshine and laughter. My children are simply fabulous!

What are your goals for December?

What Are Your Financial Expectations?

Frugal Trenches — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 06:00:18 +0000

One of the things I disliked about my happy childhood here was the sameness & apathy I grew up around. Everyone in my circle was upper-middle class, decent size houses, good education, constant talk about retirement and “not being able to afford” something, but a lot of buying, vacations and stuff. Pretty much 99% of the people I know fit into this same category and I often hear friends and colleagues say they can’t afford to adopt, work part-time or give to charity, yet they spend their weekends shopping, eating out, buying books, golfing and every few years they are upsizing to bigger houses and cars. I try to not let it bother me & see it in perspective - for them life is about comfort, being able to afford what they want {new clothes, eating out, weekends away, new books, golfing, hobbies etc}, even if they pretend it isn’t. Recently I thought a lot about what financial expectations people have in life, when I happened across someone sharing some wise words which put everything in perspective. The woman was a married mother of eight, five of whom were adopted. She shared that they feel blessed her husband’s paycheck covers their mortgage, basic bills & needed groceries each month, even if beyond that they live paycheck to paycheck and after the aforementioned expenses they have $100 a month left over which they decide on what to use it on as a family – one month it might be swimming, another month a trip to a fair. Then she said they’ve always felt exceptionally blessed that they have four months salary saved just in case. WOW! There they were, mid 40′s, thankful that they had four months salary saved just incase their family of 10 fell on hard times and there are people in my circle with, probably 5-10x that in their savings, smaller mortgages and they complain that they can’t afford things and aren’t willing to go without even a weekly Starbucks in order to help others.

This tiny encounter made me think a lot about my own financial expectations. The reality is I do “need” to build some emergency savings because if I lost my job we’d be homeless and that certainly isn’t good. But it made me also very aware and thankful that my financial goals aren’t related to storing up treasures here on earth and given the choice I’d rather have the blessing of eight children and four months income saved, then $50K in the bank, multiple houses and weekly meals out.

Speaking of treasures, look to the right of this post. Isn’t Landon a beautiful treasure?

What are your financial expectations? Have they changed over time? Do they include material treasures or eternal treasures?

Frugal Friday: Find A Banking System Which Works For You!

Frugal Trenches — Fri, 08 Jul 2011 06:00:31 +0000

Recently my blog friend Dancing left a comment on this post about banking, I replied in the comments but it spurred me onto a bigger thought about how important it is to find a banking system which works for you.

My mother for years had one bank account, a couple of years ago I convinced her to add in a second, so she now has her chequing account and her savings account. She uses her chequing account for life & the saving for a mix of emergencies, short-term savings and long-term savings. What I find, is that she gets stressed when she has to pull out of her long-term savings for a mini emergency, like needed the washing machine fixed. I guess because it is tied into her main savings account she feels like it is taking away from her hard-earned savings.

Early on I knew that type of banking system wouldn’t work for me, I need to feel like I have everything covered and I don’t need the stress of seeing my savings plummet more than they need to . It drives my mother crazy that I have more than 1-2 bank accounts, but I’ve found a system which works for me!

My accounts are as follows

Chequing – my pay is deposited automatically, all my bills/rent/groceries come out of this account, as well as giving and smaller purchases which don’t require saving for.
Mini-Emergency Fund/Short Term Savings Account – My goal is to keep a balance of about $1000 minimum in here to deal with incidentals. I do also top it up to pay for short-term/larger bills
Emergency Fund – My goal is to keep 6 months worth of income in this account, specifically for if I lost my job
Pension Fund – As I mentioned I haven’t been able to contribute in a while, but it sits there waiting! I have a Pension Fund through Friend’s Provident, and unlike 401K’s and RRSP’s in the US and Canada respectively, we can not touch our pension money until we are 55/60, even if you fall on hard times it is 100% locked in there.

So far I have to say this banking system works for me! It doesn’t deplete my hope when little incidentals arise and I can manage my money/accounts as needed, while hopefully meeting my financial goals!

What banking system do you have in place? Does it help or hinder you when it comes to your financial goals?

Food – Separating The Need From The Want

Frugal Trenches — Thu, 07 Jul 2011 06:00:40 +0000

For some reason, right after I posted my budget plan for the month, I found myself perusing recipe sights. Within ten minutes I was drooling over apple bread, alternative carbonara, cheesy pasta and chocolate smoothies. Yes, drooling is the right word. I had a look at my paltry budget and selfishly I thought but, I need food! I even planned going out and buying just a couple of ingredients to make some of my wants, basically because that chocolate smoothie sounded oh so good! As my mind began to think about all the things I could make it hit me, these are wants not needs.

Twenty minutes later I walked into my kitchen and saw dishes from dinner, I opened the fridge door and saw corn, eggplant, broccoli, salad, cranberry juice, potatoes, a favourite soup, lentil dahl, honey and cheese. I looked in the freezer and my eyes landed on black bean soup, mozzarella sticks and fish. And in the cupboards there was oatmeal, chickpeas, pumpkin seeds, dried cranberries, lentils, cous cous and rice. And while I may not have the ingredients for apple bread or cheesy pasta, I have just what I need to make a favourite, granola!

So the drooling was a good reminder - wants can masquerade as needs if we aren’t careful. We may need food, but that doesn’t mean we need what we fancy in the moment, or ingredients which are not in this week’s budget. No doubt I’ll make the same mistake many more times, but I hope one day it sinks in !

And I can’t let today go by without thanking everyone for sharing their opinion about the tv! I was shocked & surprised by the results. I think I’ve made a decision (although I welcome any other opinions/ideas) and will post once I’m certain – probably next week !

Financial Goals

Frugal Trenches — Mon, 04 Jul 2011 06:00:44 +0000

Lately I think I’ve been so focused on living in the now, understandably so, that I’ve forgotten to have a semi-plan for the long-term. I was thinking about what my financial needs & goals are over the coming 12-18 months and thought I better write them down to help keep myself accountable and make it easier to remember why it is important to say no!

Financial Goals

Pay off all debt – done June 2011 {debt from moving here and no income for several months!}
Sponsor a cot at Butterfly Children’s Hospices aka ChinaKidz – done, June 2011 the day I paid off my debt!
Purchase {or be gifted, ha!} a pull out couch
Purchase {or be gifted, double ha!} a frame for a single bed – I have the mattress but it either needs a box or a frame!
Save $1000 into a mini-emergency fund for cavities, medications, new shoes or any little needs that arise!
Save $1500 to supplement time off
Save 6 months of income into an emergency fund
Begin contributing to my retirement fund again - however small (I haven’t contributed in about two years!)
Save $10,000 for possible challenge #2 fees

It’s interesting, when I add up the total amount I need to save, it seems absolutely impossible, but when I break it up into tiny baby steps it seems like a piece of cake – well, not quite a piece of cake ;)

What are your short and long-term financial goals?

July Budget

Frugal Trenches — Sat, 02 Jul 2011 06:00:02 +0000

I mentioned yesterday that one of my goals for the month was to blog about my budget. When I blog about my monthly financial goals, I hope it helps me say no to non-essentials and keeps me motivated to continue on this path!

My budget for this month is lean but I feel like I need to pull the reigns in a tad and get used to a reduced budget. So for July, my goals are:

Food $100/£60
Pets $70/£40
Entertainment $25/£15
Incidentals $30/£20 {I need to post a few things!}
Commuting Costs $80/£45

I also have a few important “possible challenge” trips, but I’ll be using air miles as much as possible, although honestly it feels like no matter how careful I am, I’m draining money!

What are your financial goals for July?

July – Oh My!

Frugal Trenches — Fri, 01 Jul 2011 18:00:27 +0000

Before I start I wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who has left such lovely comments this week, some saying lovely kind things and others letting me know I’m not alone with my values and affirming I can make the right choice for me. There are so many wonderful, good, kind people who read this blog, people from so many different countries and circumstances, people in their 80′s and people just starting out in this grown up world; each day I am thankful for you all!

It’s time…time to get ready; I have so much to do and sometimes I find it so very very overwhelming, it is easier to stick my head in the ground. But today I’m going to write it all out and begin putting one step in front of the other on my path. And I need to get organized, desperately! July also marks my last month with no medical benefit, no sick time and no vacation time – I can’t wait until August!! Finally, July is also the last month of doing extra contract work (18 to 20 hours a week on top of my full-time job and my 18 hour commute a week - can you say demanding?! Oh yes!) in order to help fund the possible challenge. I want to be content in my circumstances, and I am, but the relief I will feel next month is already palpable!

With one more month of busyness, here are my SMART goals!

Medical/Health/Fitness

~~Go back to walk in for my ears {I keep being told it’s “just” inflammation, but I can feel them 24/7 now and they hurt unless pressed against heat, or hold my head really firmly!}~~ Went this morning - $131 later I have three prescription meds and have been told in 10 days those ears will be as good as new!
Pick up completed updated medical forms
Swim every day with ear plugs!
Walk Sophie for 1 hour/night

Possible Challenge

Two (yes, two!) trips plus I’m going to ask if they’ll let me do a third trip over my Birthday weekend
Make my final payment for fees (approx $1900)
Make list of everything I need & try not to panic about the how…{though panic I may…}

Organization

Clear out guest room closet
Clear out my room closet
Re-organize chest of drawers to make room
Figure out a system for books {I am being over-taken by books!}
Have a purge of everything not needed
Make a list of things I need

Budget

~~Set a July budget & blog it~~
~~Set goals for the next 6 months & 12 months & of course, blog it~~

Blog

Diaper/Nappy Collection for Butterfly Children’s Hospice (aka ChinaKidz) – finally, now the postal strike is over and I’ve fixed the spam
Reader survey
Frugal Friday posts 1/5
Update on monthly goals
~~Budget~~

Volunteering

Host a meal for the low-income ESL group I volunteer teaching English to!
Take Sophie to the local nursing home since she is an approved pet friend, I just get to tag along 0/2
Make lunch packs with water bottles for a group of homeless men 0/2

Social Stuff

Have my friend K over

Whew!

What are your goals for this month?

Frugal Friday: It Doesn’t Always Matter If You Have The Money Now

Frugal Trenches — Fri, 01 Jul 2011 06:00:47 +0000

One of the biggest financial mistakes I used to make (sometimes still do), and I see others make, is spending because they have the money right now. I’ve seen people have a $5000 tax return so they book a family vacation to Mexico, to find two months later they need to borrow money or fundraise on their blog because they can’t afford a $800 new stove, or a training course they need for work/life, or even school supplies for their children. I sometimes think we are so busy finding things to spend money on and so exhausted from busyness, that we simply can’t wait and plan what we will need to spend money on and find other ways to restore and relax. Of course there will always be incidentals, people get sick, cars break down, often emergencies happen in 3′s, 6′s or even 10′s! The other day I shared an example of spending gone wild on shoes, the person in question explained they had that money sitting there because they just got paid for two extra shift they did last month. But not even one week later, that same person had to ask in-laws for money for camp supplies for their children. The total they needed help with? $310 which oddly enough is the almost the amount they would have had, had they spent $30 + tax instead of $360.

Recently I found out I may have an extra special blessing, a blessing I haven’t budget for but will embrace fully. It will not be easy, but one of the best things I’ve learned is to start thinking about what your expenses will be over the coming year and plan.

Will your baby need a new carseat?
Will your pets need to go to the vet?
Will your children need school supplies, camp fees and camp supplies?
Will you need medication you’ll need to budget for?
Will you need to replace shoes, boots, coats, linens, appliances?
Will you quite possibly need an emergency fund just incase anything goes wrong?

I’m learning it isn’t necessarily about what you will need now, but instead what you may need in the future! Suddenly that $5000 tax return when you don’t have savings, would have been better spent on four nights away locally on a budget of $1000 and $4000 waiting for a rainy day. Because while there are very few things which are certain in life, one thing that is certain is that rainy day will come…

Have you ever spent money and then realized you needed it for a need down the road? How do you make sure you don’t make that same mistake?

Wedding Costs Continued…

Frugal Trenches — Tue, 28 Jun 2011 06:00:47 +0000

I recently blogged about being invited to a friend’s wedding and my reasons for deciding not to go. Within an hour of sending off my regrets, I had a phone call from the mother of the Bride inviting me to two showers.

Shower # 1

In a rural location, absolutely no public transport there. On a Sunday which means renting a car for the day, minimum cost including insurance $50
All people attending are required to give $50, which they will use to buy what they want for the new house they moved into last month
Everyone attending will also need to give $35 to cover costs of the meal

Shower # 2

On a weekday afternoon which means taking a day off work – not possible right now
All guest (even if you already attended the other shower) are required to give $50 so the Bride & Groom can buy their dream honeymoon
There will be a charge for activities but it is not known how much yet

Also shower gifts are not meant to replace wedding presents… you know, incase I wasn’t sure what was expected of me

And all I could think as I listened was – when did this become OK? When did it become normal to demand money from people? How can a couple who own 10 houses and 2 SUV’s possibly think it is OK to ask this of friends who own none? And the thing is, they aren’t alone. A few years ago I received shower invitation from a friend I had not had contact with for at least five years. A note was attached saying I wasn’t invited to the wedding because they simply couldn’t afford to invite everyone, but attached was a shower invitation with a detailed registry, with nothing listed that was less than $75. And then there were the two cousins of mine who got married recently, my mum gave each £50, cheques were cashed within a day without so much as a thank you phone call, email or card.

I would *love* to be able to take a day off and relax on a boat cruise, but more than that I want to be able to fill cavities, put shoes on feet, be able to take a day off unpaid if my child is sick, give to China Kidz, adopt more children and know I have money if I suddenly lost my job. And that, I hope is the end of the wedding talk – although now I also need to send regrets to two showers! Oh My!

Expensive vs. Well Made

Frugal Trenches — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 06:00:07 +0000

Someone I know, who has 6x my income, but 100x my debt needed new shoes the same time I did. While I didn’t want to spend, it really was a need not a want, as it was for the other person involved. The truth is cheap shoes don’t work on my feet, they hurt, they pull my back out (particularly with my 12 hour days) but I also knew I needed to stick to a budget. I decided I would budget $40 (£25) and they needed to be a good brand, sturdy and last the season. I knew my best chance was to find a more expensive brand on sale, so I:

Went online and had a look at what big stores which sell good quality shoes had sales on
I visited a local shop which sells Clarks and Birkenstocks etc. and asked them when their sales began
I window shopped and wrote down prices

The following weekend I got a $75/£50 pair of Clarks on sale for $30/£20 plus tax. But the person I mentioned got new shoes the same day we both identified needing them, bought designer shoes which cost $360/£250 including tax. Those shoes may or may not last an additional year or two compared to mine, but somehow I doubt they’ll last 10x as long as mine do. I’ll take my $30/£20 well made Clark shoes from the sales, any day! And do you know what the funny thing is? We were both standing side by side and someone complimented me on my shoes, much to the other persons chagrin. While I certainly wouldn’t want anyone to feel less or hurt, I do think it goes to show you can have style without going designer!

Do you buy expensive or well-made? Do the two always have to go hand in hand?