It has taken being away, to help me see my focus and direction over the last few months has been off.  While I could ramble off stressful things like new special needs diagnoses for my children, a huge amount of projects put on my plate, financial worries, my Godmother’s terminal cancer diagnosis, the number of hours I’ve had to work, some personal grief after two losses, challenges with my children’s birth family, my mum’s very serious accident, my arthritis, a houseguest and the list goes on, the reality is, I’ve failed to stop, think, breathe and plan how to tackle it while keeping the faith and my children’s needs first. Instead I’ve reacted, putting out one fire after another, never thinking to dig my heels in and say stop.  And the truth is, my body, mind and soul is screaming stop.

I’ve built a simple life and learned skills I’ve always wanted to know. I left academia, convenience and the suburbs I grew up in behind and found a simple existence. I learned how to knit, bake, cook, hike, grow veg, farm and make things like: shampoo, conditioner, hair spray, bug repellant, wart remedies, soap and cleaning supplies. Most importantly, I’ve leaned how to be a parent and I love it with the depths of my soul. It is who I am and who I’ve always wanted to be. My children are absolutely everything to me.

While  I’ll never have the luxury of being a stay at home parent, I really am resolved to find more time, some how, some way. My first step is this week I’m going to ask if it is possible to work my hours differently (please pray they say yes!) so that I can spend more time with my wee ones. I’m looking at my weak areas (not being able to turn off from work if I’m home) and thinking about possible solutions to give us the best emotional and mental reprieve possible given our circumstances where I need to work and earn enough as the solo income earner (this break made me realize that getting away helps cope with the stresses and strains you can’t escape, I’m thinking a 2 week camping trip next summer with no phone/internet would be good, we should be able to do it very cheaply by staying in a yurt or similar type of accommodation) and on an on-going basis, having a day a week where I’m totally unplugged from everything, as well as hopefully change my working patterns.

As far as letting in the light on a daily basis, I’m using that theme to build our monthly goals:

Home
Organize hall closet
Organize boxes from move
Get landlord to fix a few broken things
Organize chest of drawers in the family room
Organize junk drawer in kitchen
Clean out purse

My Health
See consultant rheumatologist re: arthritis
Get blood work done re: arthritis
Exercise 4x week
Drink 4-6 glasses of water a day
Use essential oils and deep breathing daily
Register for my exercise class which begins in September
Visit local track
Leave work by 4pm 2 x a week
Eat breakfast and drink water every single day before leaving the house

Family
Read Little House In The Big Wood out loud with the children
Read Little House On The Prairie out loud with the children
Take children swimming 10 x (2/10)
Hike once a week (1/4)
Volunteer at the farm as a family
Knit with daughter (1/8)
Knit with son (0/8)
Cut sons hair
Do a study on Niagara Falls 
Have kumon assessments done on both
Register for brownies & scouts for September
Register for swimming lessons for September
Attend book group
Make and complete a Genesis Creation book as a family
Return library books
Visit library and update summer reading challenge (0/2)
Take food to the foodbank with the children
Arrange or visit my Godmother (the visit may need to be in early September)
Visit a friend who recently had a baby and take her some baked goods (her parents are staying for the first 4 months and her husband is home, so I’m told with 4 adults home full time and only one newborn baby = food and cleaning is covered!)

Garden
Weed
Harvest kale and radishes
Volunteer at Community Clean up

Adoption Related
Finish adoption paper work
Sibling visit

Budget
Food $400
Petrol $150 ($50/$150)
Medications $75
Childcare $75 (only need 1 day of daycare as my mum will be here after this!)

Reading, Making & Doing
Try potato & cheese soup recipe
Menu plan (1/4)
Make a batch of muffins or bread each week for breakfasts & snacks (1/4)
Knit cowl
Finish reading Eva Luna
Finish reading Still Alice

And there you have it! In August, let there be light !

What are you up to this month?