I was reading an update the other day from a new adoptive family and oh how I remembered those hard days of adjustment. Traumatized children, no routines, adult bodies in total shock at the – well, demanding nature of it all. But lately, lately, as we hit the 6 month mark (this week in fact!), it all seems so very settled, relaxed, peaceful and like suddenly we all know what to expect. Apologies come freely for when things don’t go as planned. Little bodies previously only capable of negative words, now freely encouraging each other and me. My children wake up with smiles instead of tears. They have plans instead of hopelessness. And sometimes those plans include bowling. And bowling may be a pretty normal activity for most families, but for us, it signals my children can hold a ball, they have gained gross and fine motor skills some “professionals” thought never possible. Expert bowlers my two are. Oh yes!
And now, none of the reports matter, the chaos is gone, all is settled – these four feet are home. Not just home, but really home. Home in my mind and heart, home in the space that takes up everything in between. And as my body, heart and soul adjusted, a funny thing started happening, I began nesting, again. My body yearns to make and create and wipe tears and the hardest thing I do is begin each Monday morning anew. And suddenly each hour is a countdown to when I can hold my babies again. We are exactly where we should be. Completely and utterly belonging to each other…forever!