Monday Musings – What I assume

On Saturday I sent an email to one of my closest friends who is expecting a baby, I asked her if she had purchased her cloth nappies (aka diapers) yet, suddenly it made me realize I was making the assumption she was going to cloth diaper. I have to admit almost everyone I know in the US, Canada and the UK does, but statistically speaking most people don’t. It made me think about what I assume based on my simple, green, downshifted existence.

I assume people
:: Use cloth diapers and cloth wipes
:: Breastfeed (or try) and make their own baby food
:: Love long walks (until a friend told me today walks are boring! lol)
:: Get their 5 a day every day
:: Love veggies, specifically brussel sprouts ;0)
:: Are on the waiting list for an allotment if they don’t have one already
:: Don’t smoke
:: Drink water
:: Read the Guardian
:: Practice forgiveness
:: Give to the poor through chosen charities monthly and in times of disasters
:: Enjoy reading
:: Would rather spend less money so they can work fewer hours and give more
:: Would prefer not to shop, run errands or buy “stuff” at the weekends
:: Want pets
:: Believe in a national, free health service
:: Think racism is abhorrent
:: Are interested in self-sufficiency
:: Use eco-friendly products
:: Turn off lights
:: Conserve water
:: Give generously to friends, family, those in need
:: Support adoption and/or would adopt themselves
:: Use kind words
:: Don’t raise their voices
:: Are honest
:: Are genuine
:: Don’t gossip
:: Have traveled and lived in other countries
:: See the value in playing an instrument and speaking a second language
:: Listen to Radio Four,  CBC or NPR
:: Believe in something
:: Aren’t scared by differences or new experiences

And there you have it, those are my assumptions!
Do you assume anything? What made you realize that you do?

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About Frugal Trenches

I love the sweet nectar of life!
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52 Responses to Monday Musings – What I assume

  1. mo says:

    I assumed I was a green type. but it turns out I am only superficially green. not a great realisation! must try harder.

  2. Kat says:

    I’m afraid I don’t assume much of that about people at all! Must be a cynic! :)

    BTW, responded to your comment on my blog x

  3. Sandie says:

    I don’t assume anything about people. However, I suppose I expect them to be honest and genuine.

    I believe that we all live our lives in different ways and most people are doing the best they can.

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      “I believe that we all live our lives in different ways and most people are doing the best they can” – AMEN

      I’ve also learned we change a great deal when we are open to it and find simplicity.

  4. Sandie says:

    As for the nappies – I volunteer for an environmental charity which promotes their use. Does your friend live in an area covered by one of the Real Nappy Networks?

    In some places councils have schemes for cash back incentives too.

    In the county where I live, there is £30 cash back when £60 or over is spent on cloth nappies. There are also loan nappy packs available for parents to try.

  5. Suzan says:

    I try to not assume anything. My father has an old expression (sorry if it affends) and I grew up with this maxim, “Do not assume as it makes an A** out of U and ME.” One of the reasons my marriage failed was the constant wrong assumptions my husband made that constantly had our family in trouble.

    I will confess to a mixture of cloth and disposable nappy use. We didn’t have the shaped ones they have now. I had a few for my last and they were wonderful.

    How I wish I exercised more control over my spending and my tendency to yell. Living in Australia I have learned to use smaller amounts of water and am trying to be more green. Failure is frequent but I am trying to try.

  6. melaniesd says:

    Suzan, I admire your honest.

    With my son I had the best of intentions, but I felt so overwhelmed breast feeding didn’t workout for me. I didn’t end up trying cloth diapering.
    I think part of that challenge is family pressure. No one in my family used cloth or breastfed, so it was rather foreign to me.
    If I have another baby in the future, I will try cloth diapers. I will try breast feeding again too.
    I *did* make my own baby food and I mostly line-dried the clothes.

    I also raise my voice too much. I’m working on it though.

    I try to make greener choices.

  7. Compact UK says:

    I have to admit to being one of those people that don’t enjoy walking… not sure why. I like the idea of enjoy walking, but the reality for me is rather different. I get pains, I get bored, I get tired.

    I think a lot of people make assumptions about me that are totally inaccurate. So I try not to assume about them, as I am no better at assuming!

  8. Kelly says:

    I do use cloth diapers (nappies) 98% of the time. I will use a disposable for certain outings, like a wedding. I breast fed my daughter for a year and made all my own baby food. However I never assumed this is what everyone else did, because a lot of my friends used all the disposable, manufactured counterparts. I had people ask me why do I make my own baby food when Gerber does a great job, why breastfeed – if I were to use formula then I wouldn’t be solely responsible for feeding my child, and Why or Why would I ever want so much interaction with poop? Disposable diapers you change it and forget it. I can honestly say that I don’t regret any of those things and can’t wait to do them with future children!

  9. M says:

    I think it is impossible for anyone to say they never assume anything, we are human and make mistakes, judgements, assumptions and have bias. It is like saying you don’t see colour.

    I think it is very healthy to be aware of the assumptions you make, the ideals you have, the norms that are unique to you. I do not believe that it makes you judgemental and in fact they are two very very different traits and qualities.

    I, as always, enjoy your honesty.

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      Thanks M, I try to be very honest with how I feel, otherwise I feel like I’m lying. I agree that assumption and judgement are not synonyms.

  10. DH and I frequently wondered how we could have less bills than many of our friends and yet have less disposable income. Then I realized I was assuming that most of the people we know who are our age tithe or give regularly to charity–come to find out, most of them don’t. I’m always surprised when I remember this because giving brings us SO much joy.

  11. Oh I defintely assume and wrongly frequently. But its okay we all base things off our individual experience. Before I moved to where I am now, I assumed that people had the resources to live “green” but that they just chose not to…now I know how wrong that is….

    And ironically I can think of many “green” individuals who wouldn’t agree with several of the things on your list. ;-) Isn’t life funny?!

  12. Kathryn says:

    I really agree with M’s comments and think it is obvious you were not judging anyone!!!! Wow, this is why I could never have a blog, you say something and people run off with an idea before thinking about it.

    I think there is a really really big difference between assuming values, honesty etc prevail, or assuming people would want to try something that is known to be healthy, and judgement. It is so obvious to anyone who reads this blog you share your journey and struggles and are not judging others!!! Sorry, trying not to get defensive for you, but I just feel it!!!! I mean it isn’t like you said I assume everyone who doesn’t breastfeed is not a good mother! Gesh! Sorry, I feel protective of my friend who encourages me so much without judgement.

    We all have things which make us unique, there is nothing wrong with that, I would say it shows your emotional development that you are aware of it, compared to others who might hide it or as M said deny it exists.

    ThisThriftedLife thank you so much for sharing your comment about giving and tithing! It is so nice to hear that giving brings joy to people!

  13. Elizabeth says:

    Never assume anything, about anyone – it can often lead to misunderstandings. A lesson I’ve learnt over many years of making mis-assumptions.

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      it’s funny I think I’ve certainly most probably made some mistakes with assumptions and yet also gained great joy.

  14. Jessica says:

    I don’t think I could use cloth diapers with our adopted child although I’d like to but I think I’ll have to see how it goes.

  15. Jen says:

    The two things I think I assume about most people I know (not most people in general) is that they recycle, and that they wouldn’t think twice about adopting a dog or cat from a shelter. When I run into people who don’t do either of those two, it shocks me. There certainly are other things I’m sure I just assume but those two are biggies for me.

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      I can relate Jen. I recently know cats were having to be put down due to there being too many at the shelter, at the same time a friend who’se a Vicar went and bought one for £1000. I was and am still shocked!

  16. kathleen says:

    One of my favorite chores of motherhood was folding cloth diapers warm out of the dryer (I didn’t hang them out to dry, because I wanted them softer on my babies’ bottoms). I used the big old rectangle kind that you folded in half, then into a kite shape. The warmth and the repitition was so relaxing…almost therapeutic.

  17. shoestringalley says:

    Your list is interesting and made me think about what assumptions I make. Someone I know often talked about the curry she makes from scratch but it turned out that she just added meat to a jar of sauce. There’s nothing wrong with that (I do it myself from time to time) but I just assumed she made the sauce as well! Turns out my assumptions are over quite silly things really…

  18. Pingback: Monday Night Round UP! « Notes From The Frugal Trenches – A Downshifting Journey

  19. Anna says:

    I think we base our assumptions on what we are surrounded by, what we are striving to do…..and our ideal version of the world.

    We assume that these things are as important to others as they are to ourselves.

    I assume that others share the same opinion as me frequently. I work with a great team where nearly every day turns into a debate about how to approach things. I work in HR so there are new challenges every day.

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      Anna, you know I think you’ve hit the nail on the head, I think that is why we make assumptions! For me, it is usually thinking the best of people!

  20. Frugal Years says:

    I find that assumptions many times lead to dissapointment.

  21. trudy says:

    Your assumptions show the most wonderful optimism… They are lovely and made me smile. As John Lennon once sang ‘you may say I’m a dreamer
    but I’m not the only one’… hugs Trudy

  22. lucid says:

    I don’t make too many assumptions about other people, but if I had to name a couple off the top of my head…I assume everyone loves at least one other person in this world and that there is one person that loves them. I’d assume that everyone has one passion in life. I also assume that everyone wants to be successful (whatever that may mean to them personally) and will at least try to do what they can to achieve that success.

  23. Lien says:

    I assume that everyone recycles but how wrong I am!

  24. Gill says:

    nothing to say other than I HATE brussels sprouts…LOL

    Gill in Canada

  25. Looby says:

    What a great post, I can’t think of my more common assumptions right now, but I’m sure I have many!
    I did use to assume that everyone ate at home most evenings and enjoyed cooking but I have been put off that notion for several years now!
    (oh and I force brussels on my dinner guests quite regularly- and have won over 2 out 3 of my victims!)

  26. moralia says:

    I don’t assume anything… I do like to “assume” that *most* people are honest & pure in heart… but we all know that’s not true… other than that, I think it’s best not to have assumptions on other peoples lives.

    http://www.halfdozendaily.wordpress.com

  27. Stella says:

    I don’t really assume much at all. I’m really very aware of how much people vary in their perspectives.
    Like Moralia, the one thing I do assume is that people are honest and straightforward.
    Having recently been let down by someone I really believed in, I am now having a bit of a rethink.
    But honestly, I wouldn’t want to be the sort of person to be cynical about everyone and everything. I still want to think the best of people, even if once in a while I am proved wrong.
    One thought about the cloth loo wipes. Doesn’t the extra washing invoved defeat the object from and environmental perspective? Isn’t recycled loo paper a better option?

    • Frugal Trenches says:

      probably a good assumption!

      well so far I haven’t found it any extra laundry, but I’m going to keep tabs on this over the week and include it in my post! Thanks Stella!

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