Maybe in Dolly’s world but certainly not mine! Currently, how I feel, is more along the lines of:
I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat – Winston Churchill
Everyone who reads this blog knows I want to downshift. Downshifting when you haven’t made money on property, have only 1 income and pay more rent than some of your friends bring home in pay… well it makes downshifting very very hard. There are days like today where I feel it is impossible. There are days I think I will never escape the rat race, never live in more than a 1 bedroom flat, never meet the “right guy”…there are days I wonder if my dreams really are attainable. But then I remember that my dreams aren’t about being rich, they aren’t about driving sports cars or owning a large home, my dreams are pretty simple – part time work, a small cottage with a bit of land to keep chickens & rescue rabbits and, of course, motherhood.
So, how will I get there.
On days like today, where I had to leave my desk after 11 hours of sitting answering telephone call after telephone call, email after email, well lets just say I leave work not knowing whether to laugh or cry. I used the bus ride home to contemplate what it will really take.
So, this post, is probably more for me – a record of what I need to do in order to reach my dream:
1. I need to find work/life balance so that I stay healthy, can manage a demanding career and enjoy life while I’m working towards my dream.
2. I need to find regular hobbies and interests that give me a piece of my dream – time spent outdoors surrounded by nature is a very good thing
3. I need to see dreams as a series of baby steps, each £100, £250, £500, £1000 is 1 step closer.
4. I need to find the time to put my cheques in the bank, so that I can see my balance growing.
5. I need to ensure that no matter how many hours I sit at my desk and how much work I have left to do, that I get 7 hours sleeping each & every night and my 8 glasses of water a day – for the last 2 weeks I haven’t accomplished either and boy do I feel it!!!
6. I need to remember that I am human and will make oh so many mistakes – my motto “forgive yourself & move on” has to apply to me too
7. I have to remember that I can say no and it doesn’t make me a bad person or bad employee. My boss make not like it, but every single person has limits.
8. I need to ensure I have time away, time spent with friends and time to myself
9. I need to remember not only does my body need taking care of, but so does my soul. Deep breathing, praying, meditating, exercising and reading are all things that help the soul.
10. I need to remember each and every single day that no matter how “hard” I think I have it the reality is this: I am not an orphan dying of HIV, I am not a child sitting in an orphanage with no one to love me, I am not a child walking 10 miles several times a day to get infested water for my family, I am not a child who was forced to be a child soldier, I am not a woman who is facing battery or abuse, I am not a person who can not breath, skip, run or jump. I am very very lucky indeed.
And now I invite you all to watch the video above, boogie in your room and tell me you too feel inspired!!
Thank you!!! x
I do believe that you will get to where you want to be, you are so wise for your years, I wish I had been the same when I was younger. I love number 10 btw and will try to remember that one when i feel down.
I’m sorry to read that things weren’t better today after your crazy 2 weeks. Great attitude though and I know you will succeed at downshifting also!!
Number 10 is so true. How often we lose focus of that one and take what we have for granted is sad. It’s good that you’re making a conscious effort to re-align yourself with your goals. You can do it!!! Look what you have accomplished already!!
I think you’re doing a great job (you’re an example to me for setting goals and being disciplined) I like your list of reminders… I think that having that ‘waaah this will never work out feeling!’ sometimes is normal. The cool thing about you is that you don’t let it stop you. Yay!
That’s a great list. The kind everyone should have for the bad days. I hope work calms down.
::hug::
You sound like you had the same kind of day I did.
The step I’ve taken is to get my qualifying coursework out of the way – it means more money in the long-run, and more transferable skills so if I can’t move up where I’m at, I can shift organizations.
Keep your chin up!
Hi there-so sorry that work is stressing you out so much. Keep hold of these goals and don’t forget them. You are a great inspiration to all of us and you are doing tremendously well, its just your work situation is unfortunately having to take priority at the moment. keep well and healthy and don’t lose sight that you have been and still are doing really great progress! BTW, check out http://www.east-homes.co.uk, they feature shared ownership properties and have other info plus contact info on here too!
Great post. I’m in awe of the things you have achieved in your life already and really wish I’d had your amazing attitude when I was your age. I’ve been reading about the ‘snowflake effect’ recently on various blogs and it seems to make sense to me – every tiny little step you take adds another little layer to your ultimate goal.
Also, re: point 7. Do not be afraid to say ‘no’ to your boss. In my experience they respect you a lot more if you do set limits.
I’m absolutely sure you’ll get there – as I’ve said before, I’ve seldom met anybody with as much determination as you and certainly not anybody as young as you. If anybody can do it, you can.
Sure, there will be days when everything feels unachievable; we all have them but as your number 10 points out, there’s always somebody worse off. I think the problem is though, the starving children etc are so far off that they don’t really affect our lives so we tend to not think about them. Believe me, I have days when I feel very sorry for myself but then I see somebody who’s in a worse situation than me and suddenly my life doesn’t seem so bad after all.
An example. Last week I was feeling pretty down about being dependant on the hospital to be able to even go down to London to see my family, let alone go anywhere else. My travel feed has to be arranged beforehand along with the meds I need and I felt ‘controlled’ – like my life isn’t my own to do as I wish. Then, while I was arranging this, the co-ordinator told me about those who can’t even use travel feed because there bodies won’t accept it so can’t go anywhere at all, ever again. Boy did I feel lucky afterwards!
This is the first time I have been here, just wanted to say HI! and you know things will change for the better, but I understand when you are living through it – it is quite exhausting. I had a job like you describe until earlier this year when I left to do casual work in a completely different industry. All I can say is that 6 months later all that just feels like a bad dream. You are right about focusing on keeping yourself healthy and the short and long term goals.
“big dreams start small” and remember laughing is good for your health.
sorry you’re in such a crunch these days! with your determination, I have no doubt you will meet your goals. as for the right guy…. You are a GREAT thing that is going to happen to some guy! Wait and see
Oh Frugal …. SO much sense. When are you going to write that book?
Thanks too for your lovely comments on my blog … I really appreciate your support.
Isn’t there a saying something like “Be careful what you dream of, for it will come true” ….
Sometimes when it seems to us that nothing is happening, everything is happening.
Here is a site I thought you might enjoy. I think it’s great for the downshifting mind: http://down—to—earth.blogspot.com/
Do you know what type of part-time work you want to do in your new downshifted life?
Don’t lose heart you are doing such a good job. Just remember you never know what is round the next corner waiting for you – it could be something wonderful.
Best wishes
Sharie
Brava, my friend, brava. Yes, we have difficult and demanding lives, but it’s always wise to remember that we are mobile, are capable, and are more lucky than many many people out there. We shouldn’t feel bad for what we have, either, it’s just important to remember our blessings and appreciate them while we still can.
So many have it much worse than we do, and it could always always be worse than it is now, so thank goodness for what we do have, and keep your chin up in the meantime!
You’re doing great, and hope work clears up for you soon!
I’m inspired and I boogied!!!
It’s obvious you’ve thought carefully about your life and the role work plays in it. The great thing that stands out to me is that you feel in control, even when you feel tired and you’ve had a bad day. You have your goals, and I doubt much will get in your way. Stay strong, love, you’ll get there.
hey there – just to remind you – re motherhood – you don’t have to do that on your own. I mean, motherhood is part of parenthood, and while it isn’t absolutely impossible without him (you can go to a sperm bank / adopt etc) do you not see the fact that you could have a father for your child and that man could actually HELP you!! you should also start looking for HIM